Marina Lombardo, LCSW
Within Every Challenge...

...Are the Seeds of Opportunity

SEEDS OF GROWTH NEWSLETTER
FALL 2007

In This Issue...

Introduction
Feature Article
What's New
Feedback from Readers

Marina Lombardo
Psychotherapy, Counseling & Personal Coaching
Lake Bennet Medical Center
1151 Blackwood Avenue, Suite 120
Ocoee, FL 34761
(407) 615-0848
www.marinalombardo.com


Welcome Everyone!

In this issue, I’m picking up where I left off the last time. My last newsletter, Guilt is Good, Part I, looked at guilt in general terms: what it is, and why you’re so susceptible to it. I also gave you some homework: to notice the times and the circumstances that cause you to feel guilty. (If you didn’t get this issue, or need a refresher, just click “Past Newsletters” on the navigation, to get a copy).

OK—now you’re ready to go to the next level: specifically, how recognizing your own guilt signals can actually help you move forward…

Guilt is Good, Part II

For so many of us, the value of guilt as a signal that we’re doing something wrong has been so distorted, that we can’t always count on it to keep us on the right track.

What to do?

Consider this: what if you learned to reinterpret the signals guilt gives you so that you could see guilt as an ally to help you make positive change?

To see how this might work, try this on for size. The next time you feel guilty for making a “good-for-you” choice, like booking some self-pampering time, putting your feet up and taking a Saturday afternoon off, or saying “no!” to a commitment you really would rather not, take a long, slow deep breath, and follow these three steps:

1. Notice what is happening in your body. Do your shoulders get tight? Do you get butterflies in your stomach? Don’t try to change anything; just notice your body’s response.

2. Next, notice your thoughts. What do you find yourself thinking? Are you afraid someone will be angry, or not like you? Do you find yourself imagining that you’ll be abandoned or end up a worthless sack of you-know-what?! Again, just notice.

3. Finally, step into the awareness of your thoughts, feelings and your body’s physical response, totally and completely. Take a long, slow deep breath.

What you have discovered is your own personal guilt grid. This is the way your body and your thoughts react when you get out of your comfort zone, and make your own well-being a priority.
If you start thinking that you are doing something wrong, or that you need to change your plans—STOP and realize that you are at a decision point! Right now, you can go back to your old way of being OR choose to see these signals as your body and brain giving you the green light to keep going.

That’s right—move forward even though you previously interpreted these signals as a stop sign.

Because you see, what you are feeling isn’t guilt, but just the growing pains of a more balanced way of being: give and take, work and play.

Are you going to feel guilty when you first start to make yourself a priority and take the time you need? Absolutely! Is it going to last forever? Definitely not!

A good way of thinking about it is to imagine that guilt has been driving your car. Start now by taking back the wheel and putting guilt in the passenger seat. Then after a while, move it to the back seat. Then, the trunk…and before long, you’ll be waving good bye as you leave guilt behind!

Until next time…
Be well!
marina

 

What's New

My new book, “I am More Than My Infertility, 7 Proven Tools for Turning a Life Crisis into a Personal Breakthrough”, which I co-authored with Linda J. Parker, is now available! These universal tools can apply to any crisis or life challenge. You can purchase a copy from either one of my websites, www.marinalombardo.com or www.iammore.net. The book is also available on www.amazon.com.

Conceive on Air!

Listen live on Wednesday, at 2pm, EST by logging onto www.voiceamerica.com/conceiveonair. If you missed my 10/24/07 broadcast, “You Are More Than Your Fertility,” when I talked to radio host Kim Hahn about my book, you can log onto it via my website, www.marinalombardo.com. Archived radio shows are also available via my website, along with my prior newsletters. Just navigate to “Helpful Links.”

Archived radio shows are also available via my website, along with my prior newsletters.

Focus Seminars

Last weekend, I was fortunate enough to spend time in Kansas City with my friends Wayne McKamie and his wife, Pam. Wayne is founder of Focus Seminars (www.focusseminar.com), a breakthrough personal growth seminar offered several times in Kansas City and other parts of the country.

In addition to the seminars, Wayne and Pam offer quarterly workshop for married couples to present way for them to strengthen their relationship. What an honor it was for me, along with my husband Mark, to lead this workshop. This really was a give and take experience, as the power of the group really energized our 30 year marriage!

As a bonus, the next morning I was a guest on Focus Sunday, an KCSM radio show (www.93maxfm.com) and talk about my upcoming book. I’ll be sure to let you know as soon as this broadcast is available on line.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007 at 7 p.m.
I will be speaking at Infertility Support of Central Florida (an affiliate of Resolve), at their meeting in Winter Park. My presentation will interweave the tools in my book with ways to deal with the holidays if you’re struggling with infertility. For information, check out their website at www.resolveofcentralflorida.org.

Conceive Magazine

Next issue is scheduled to be on newsstands at the end of November. Don’t miss my Emotionally Speaking column, I am More Than my Fertility, which will be an excerpt of my new book.

 

Feedback from Readers

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